"Summer's Love Song"

this song is my new obsession. spring, I love you...but I can't deny the longing for summer.

By: Clarensau

the sun, the sun will come out soon

and our feet will soak in the morning dew

and summer’s love song will play into our ears

summer’s love song will be beautiful and clear

and so I’ll sing of the morning, sing of the morning light

like it may be the only light, I’ll sing

oh the sun, the sun will come out soon

(this I promise you)

and our pain, I hope it leaves us soon

(please leave us soon)

and summer’s love song will play into our ears

summer’s love song will be beautiful and clear

and oh, we’ll sing

oh, we’ll sing

until the morning brings the light we need

and oh, we’ll sing until our lungs give

and then we’ll sing until the darkness leaves

if it’s not easy

we’ll keep breathing

if it’s not easy

we’ll keep singing through the night

Sometimes, believe it or not, I have very few words.

But this is what I have on my mind: Japan... the situation has been weighing heavily on my heart, especially for the last two days. I continue to pray, but feel as though I need to do more, and not sure what that looks like. One of my prayers right now is that we, as believers, can through this devastation be given opportunities to share even more openly about our faith, and bring hope to those who have none.

“Children of God, sing your song and rejoice for the love that He has given us all.”

Today a friend posted Romans 8:18 on his profile: “For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.” The sufferings of the present are slight when compared with the glory that is coming..

“One day He’s coming...oh, glorious day!"

When it comes to blogging...

...don’t follow my lead. Haha. I was never very good at keeping a journal, so I don’t know what made me think I would continuously update a blog. I think it’s the realization that perhaps no one will ever read it, but I suppose that doesn’t matter. There is something to say for having space to get our thoughts out in the open...an aspect of our freedom that I’m sure we usually take for granted. Anyways, it has been awhile, and a lot has happened in my life since October. If I had to sum up everything in very few words, I would have to say that the last five-ish months have been a whirlwind of lessons only the Lord could teach me. Some of them extremely tough, but He knows what He’s doing...that I am sure of now (obviously, one of the lessons learned).

My whole life I’ve had issues with confidence in myself (which I’m sure many of us have), but last year was the lowest I’ve ever felt in that department. I went into my last quarter at Cascadia dreading every second of it, not wanting anything to do with anyone or anything other than my studies. By the end of my first day of classes, God had already completely changed my attitude...something I was not at all prepared for. I’ve always known God was real, and had faith that He was working in my life, but it has never been revealed to me so strongly. The friends I made and the experiences I had during those eleven weeks I will never forget. I came out of them with a new confidence in who I am in Christ and this crazy wonderful excitement for life, even though I’m still very unsure about where I’m heading next...yeah, you heard me, excited for the unknown. Everybody can be shocked now.

“Love makes an invisible God visible.” – Hans Peter

Pink Peonies = Love.

I had a dream last night...

I was at a wedding, a beautiful outdoor wedding on the lawn in someone's backyard. There were a few clouds in the sky, but no one seemed to care. White fold-up chairs lined both sides of the aisle. I don't remember anyone who was there...all I remember is the bride walking down the aisle with the most gorgeous bouquet of pale pink peonies I have ever seen.

I have no idea why I had this dream or why the flowers are what struck me, but what I do know is that it has given me great joy all day just remembering those images. God is good.

Believe and be satisfied.

When I was in Canada a few weekends ago, my dear friend Bre gave me this to encourage me. I've been trying to figure out who wrote it, but no luck so far. I've read it almost everyday since...what a beautiful reminder it is!

Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone, to have a deep soul relationship with another, to be loved thoroughly and exclusively. But God says to a Christian, "No, not until you are satisfied and fulfilled and content with living, loved by me alone, with giving yourself totally and unreservedly to me alone. I love you, my child, and until you discover that only in me is your satisfaction to be found, you will not be capable of the perfect human relationship that I have planned for you. You will never be united with another until you are united with me, exclusive of anyone or anything else, exclusive of any other desires or longings.

"I want you to stop planning, stop wishing, and allow me to give you that most thrilling plan existing, one that you can't imagine. I want you to have the BEST! Please allow me to bring it to you. You just keep watching me, expecting that satisfaction, expecting the greatest things, and know that I Am. Keep learning and listening to the things I tell you. You must wait!

"Don't be anxious. Don't worry. Don't look around at the things others have received. Don't look at the things you think you want. You just keep looking off and away up to me, or you'll miss what I want to show you.

"And then, when you're ready, I'll surprise you with a love far more wonderful than you would ever imagine. You see, until you are ready and until the one I have for you is ready (I am working this very minute to have both of you ready at the same time), until you are both satsifeid exclusively with me and the life I have planned and prepared for you, you won't be able to experience the love that exemplifies your relationship with me...and this is perfect love.

"Dear one, I want you to have this most wonderful love. I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with me and to enjoy materially and concretely the everlasting union of beauty and perfection and love that I offer you with myself. Know that I love you utterly, I am God Almighty. Believe and be satisfied."

--Author Unknown

Football Season

What is it about college football that just makes me go completely crazy? Like, really....I wear UW colors every Saturday, if I can't watch or listen to the game then I get text updates every ten minutes from my dad or brother, I have a tendency to bash WSU on a regular basis (forgive me), the color crimson becomes evil, and if the Dawgs don't win (which happens often, unfortunately) I literally get depressed. What is it about guys running and tackling each other trying to gain possession of a silly ball that gets my heart pumping? These questions ran through my mind yesterday as I watched the UW lose their opening game of the season against BYU (really??!). Most of it has to do with the fact that I grew up with a father who has been a season ticket holder for the past 20 years. One year, we even had a purple and gold themed Christmas tree...I'm not kidding. And don't even get me started on the Apple Cup. Anyways, all I'm getting at is: I'm a committed Husky football fan. I don't know every one of the players names, nor do I know every stat like my crazy father, but as far as I'm concerned...they are my team. And although they often let me down (at least in the past couple years), I still love them.

Now, I'm not saying my love for the Huskies in unconditional, because that is certainly not the case! But this just got me thinking about the Lord (haha...from football to God, go figure). No matter what we do, God still loves us. We can mess up, take a wrong turn, make a bad decision, yet His love is constant. This doesn't mean we can just keep sinning and never think twice of course, but isn't it wonderful to know that the God of the universe longs for us to be in relationship with Him, despite our imperfections??

Anyways, random thoughts....but that's just me. I love football....but I love God much more :)

Go Huskies!

"My Joy...Your Joy"

This was the title of the daily devotion in My Utmost for His Highest the other day...and my goodness, it certainly is what I needed to hear. Sometimes it seems like things are going great - life is good and there is nothing that could possibly alter that happiness. Unfortunately, we all have at one time or another gotten hit with something huge in our lives, something which we felt was too big for us to handle. Many of us, including myself, have struggled but made it through those times of hurt and pain...but certainly not in our own strength. For me, this season in my life is one of healing. Restoration. A time when God is truly molding me into the young woman that He intended for me to be. Of course, there is still often times pain during healing. When I read this devotion, I realized just how much I long to be joyful.

These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may remain in you, and that your joy may be full —John 15:11

We cannot have joy when we are so consumed by our own circumstances. It takes surrender and sacrifice to be joyful...take Jesus for example: Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. - Hebrews 12:2